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Impostor footage. Not the brothers

Go on then

Ask us anything

16 answers, all of them true. Where the honest answer is that nobody has decided yet, this page says so instead of inventing something better. Hash calls that a failure of ambition.

Placeholder photograph of a Shar Pei looking straight at the camera, standing in for a picture of the brothersPlaceholder photo
nothing invented
  • The shopOpen, and the buttons work. Potato has already spent the money.
  • Custom videosNot open, and no price is set. Hash holds somebody responsible.
  • The photosNot them yet. Every stand in says so on its face.

Set one

The brothers

Who they are, and why there is so much skin involved.

  • Who are Potato and Hash?

    Two Shar Pei brothers. Potato greets everybody, every time, whether they asked to be greeted or not. Hash watches you for a while, reaches a decision, and never revisits it. This website was their idea. The rest of it was left to somebody else, and they would like to know what is taking so long.

    Meet them properly

  • Are they really brothers?

    Yes. Same family, same skin, no shared opinion on anything.

  • Why are they so wrinkly?

    Shar Pei arrive with a good deal more skin than dog. Some of it settles as they grow and plenty of it never does. It is not a fault in this house. It is presence, and it is to be admired on arrival.

  • Are the photos on this site really Potato and Hash?

    Not yet. Until their own photographs and clips exist, some of what you see is a stand in, and every one of those carries a small Placeholder label so you are never guessing. Hash has noticed the other dogs on his website and has raised it twice.

Set two

Shop and custom videos

The two things we are asked about most. One of them is open, and one of them is not.

  • Can I buy merch?

    Yes. The shop is open and the checkout takes real payments. The product photographs are stand ins for now and each one carries its Placeholder label, so you always know what you are looking at. Potato has decided the shop is his. He was asleep for the whole of it.

    Go to the shop

  • Where do you ship to?

    A set list of countries, and the shipping page names every one of them along with what postage costs. If yours is not on it the payment page will not offer your country in the address form, so you find that out while your basket is still a basket. Hash regards every parcel leaving the house as something taken off him.

    Read the shipping page

  • Can I request a personal video from them?

    Not today. Requests are not open yet, so nothing can be ordered. The custom videos page sets out exactly how it will work when they are, and Potato has already said yes to requests nobody has sent.

    See how it will work

  • How much does a custom video cost?

    No price is set. Rather than show a number that might change, it stays off this site until it is final. Potato would like it known that he considers himself expensive.

Why some answers stop

We would rather say we do not know.

A price, a date, a turnaround. Each one is easy to guess at and impossible to take back once somebody has planned around it. So the answers here stop where the facts stop, and they grow the day there is something real to put in them.

Ask us the one that is missing

Placeholder photograph of a Shar Pei out walking in the sun, standing in for a picture of the brothersPlaceholder photo
Not one number on this page is a guess.

Set three

Photos, videos and following along

Where to find them, and what you may do with what you find.

  • Where can I follow them?

    The follow page lists every official channel. If a channel is not on that page, the account is not live yet, so treat anything else claiming to be them as somebody else and their dog.

    See the official channels

  • Can I use your photos or videos?

    Personal sharing is very welcome. Commercial use needs permission first, so please write to us before using anything in a paid or promotional setting.

  • Is there a newsletter, and what does it involve?

    There is. You give an address, we email you a link, and you are only on the list once you open that link, which is how we make sure nobody signs anybody else up. Every issue we send carries an unsubscribe link at the bottom.

    Join the list

  • Do you work with brands?

    Yes, on the right ones. Read the press and partnerships page, then send the actual details and we will take a proper look. They describe themselves as selective. Neither has ever had to be.

    Press and partnerships

Set four

The website and your details

What this site keeps, what it does not, and where to send the complaint.

  • What happens to my email address?

    It is used to send you the newsletter, and nothing else. It is never sold and never handed to anyone. Ask us to delete it and we will, no reason needed.

    Read the privacy page

  • Are you tracking me?

    Only if you say yes. There is a Google Analytics tag on this site and it counts nothing until you press the button that says count me. Press no thanks, or ignore the bar entirely, and no analytics cookie is written and your visit is not counted. The cookie page names the cookies, says what the tag does before you answer, and lets you change your answer whenever you like.

    Read the cookie page

  • Something here is hard for me to use

    Then it is our problem to fix, not yours to work around. The accessibility page sets out what this site already does and what is still missing, and it is kept honest rather than flattering.

    Read the accessibility page

  • How do I report a problem with the website?

    Email info@potatoandhash.com and tell us what happened. If something is hard to use, or impossible to use with a keyboard or a screen reader, we want to know and we will fix it.

    Send us a message

Not here?

Then ask us the real one.

A real person reads every message. If the answer is that we have not worked it out yet, that is the answer you get. Hash has claimed the inbox as his own. Nobody agreed to that, and it changes nothing about who reads it.